Three Is a Crowd

by John Killick

At 11:06pm on Saturday, March 21, 2013, the emergency despatch in a certain large city received a call from an agitated, clearly terrified individual who identified himself as Justin Murchison, 24, entry-level employee at a large brokerage firm in that same city. He was reporting an emergency in another city, saying that he feared that his grirlfriend, Rosanna Michaels, had been hurt or worse. After calming Mr. Murchison enough to ascertain Ms. Michaels\\' address, the emergency dispatcher alerted police in the city where Ms. Michaels was resident. When they arrived at her address, they found the said Ms. Michaels dead, seated in front of a lap-top computer, a look of petrified terror frozen on her face.

Questioning of Mr. Murchison revealed that he had been communicating with the deceased via an internet chat software when Ms. Michaels had died. Ge was too distraught and terrified to give a coherent account of what had transpired, but police investigators found his chat transcripts. They are published below, unaltered or abridged. Discretion is advised for sensitive or faint-hearted readers.

Loadedgeek: Hey babe, you on-line?

Roseredd: What kept you? :(

LG: Sorry.. Held up at work.

RR: You could\\'ve got ob-line with your \\'phone!

LG: I was driving hun, you know I\\'m a law-abiding guy :)

RR: You that boring huh?

LG: Touche! :D

RR: DD

LG: How was your day?

RR: The usual. SSDD.

LG: Sounds very familiar (Flower)

RR: Aww sweedy.. for little old me?

LG: (wink) Who else would they be for?

(Amorousangel logs in)

Amorousangel: Hi you two. Well, they might be for me Davey boy (Kiss)

LG: ???

RR: Who aare you? How\\'d u get in our chat?

AA: Why, Rosie m\\'dear, Davey-boy invited me :)

LG: WHAT???

RR: Dave? WTF?

LG: i don\\'t know what this is about babe..

AA: Oh that\\'s so sweet of you Davey-baby, to call me \\'babe\\'. Last night when we fucked, you just called me bitch :)

RR: What\\'s she fucking talking about Dave? Who are you, you slut?

AA: now, now rosie.. It was Davey-Boy that hit on me you know...

LG: Shut up you bitch! I don\\'t know wtf u are. Rose, listen, i dunno who this is

RR: How\\'d she get in our chat?

AA: ??? No wonder Davey-baby is looking for a bit on the side.. you are so thick! I told you, HE invited me!

LG: SHUT UP YOU LYING CUNT!

RR: So that\\\\s what u r up to evry nite rght? OT my arse!

AA: U mean he told YOU that OT story too??? Hosh davey-baby..

RR: If U don\\'t know her, how does she know my FUCKING PET NAME 4 U, arsehole?

AA: :Shocked) U mean.. U use taht too??? (crying)

LG: Look, hun, ROSE i mean, this is just some a-hole playing a prank, pronly your ex BF or something

RR: Ohh.. It HAS to be someune to do with ME!!! seems like she knows YOU pretty well

AA: Sure do. He\\'s got a pimple on his left ball, did that turn U off like it did me, Rose?

RR: SEEEE!!!!! You fuckin cheating sob

AA: See Davey, she duzn\\'t like u like i do LOL

LG: Rose! Rosie, I really dunno

RR: No, always got an excuse right? Just like with Emma Brown, right? SHE hit on YOu..my ass

LG: Fuck.. How fuckn long ago waz that??? how many millions of sorries have i said about that?

AA: Forget about the silly cunt Davey, like u said, she\\'s no goodf in the sack anyway, doesn\\'t do it up the backdoor like we did, right? (Kiss)

RR: YOU FUCKING WHORE!!!!!

LG: Fuck off whuever u r, it\\'s NOT FUNNY.. I\\'ll effin kill u when I find out whou u are

AA: So you like it ruff? I can go there (Wink)

LG: Hey Rose, let\\'s use our other chat app, ok? Get ridof this prick, must be one of my \\'mates\\' with his idea of a joke..

RR: Fuck u, I hate u..

AA: I still love u davey-baby (Heart)

RR: Good 2 know u tell all your ahole mates ALL about me, piece of shit

LG: look, just get over to the other app, OK? Bye.

(LG logs out)

AA: OK see u there!!!

RR: Fuck off and die u whore!!!!

(RR Logs out)

AA: (kiss)

9AA Logs out)

Session ends.

It appears Mr. Murchison and Ms. Michaels then accessed another chat application. Below is the transcript from that session and again sensitive and/or faint-hearted readers (and minors) are advised not to read.

WorkingOT4U10: Hey, Rosie, u there?

WOT\\\" Rosie??? Should I give u a call?

Rosegarden09: No. I\\'m here.

WOT: Thank Christ... :)

RG: Who the hell was that Dave? How\\'d she know all that shit? Tell me the truth!!!

WOT: Look, I really dunno, but i\\'m pretty sure it wasn\\'t a SHE.. Has to ne some jealous prick I know or maybe u know

RG: Shut up already, no-one I know would be such a fucking bastard.

WOT: Well, whatever..WHOevr, its over now, theres now ay they can follow us here

RG: Unless you gave them your xxxx (application name blanked for legal reaons)

DevilwantsU: Hi u 2, sorry I\\'m late!

RG: OMG

WOT: WTF??? WHOOO RRR UUUU????

DWU: U know who i am Dave, or did all that coke u snorted blank ur memory? :)

RG: Coke? What the fuck Dave?

WOT: SHUT UP U Cunt! I meant this bitch..not U ROSE!!!

RG: How does she know all this? How can she get on OUR chats?

DWU\\\" GOD this bitch is slow... HE GAVE ME YOUR ACCOUNT DETAILS you cow :D

WOT: Bullshit, she/he whoever iz lying, u r so dead.. Look, I\\'m gonna call the cops, they\\'ll trace the prick\\'s IP

DWU: Oh come off it, what crime have I committed davey-gravy? (angerl)

RG: Yeah, Dave you cunt, she\\'s right! And guess what, I fucked your friend Gavin, love that spider tat he\\'s got on his arse :)

WOT: WTF??? U DID WHATTT???

DWU: ROFL NOW it all comes out... roowww!!! scratch, jiss, bite! :D

WOT: ROSE??? You and Gav???

RG: I didn\\'t write taht dave..OMG..How did she DO that? I didn\\'t write that... NUT I DO HATE U.. AND I\\'M GONNA SLICE YOUR MUM\\'S GUT OPEN, U WATCH (Skull and Crossbones)

WOT: WTF??? U Bitch!!!!

DWU: Surely u mean HER this time??? LMAO

RG: Dave, that wasn\\'t ME!!! Wait, i\\'ll call u..

DWU: Oh.. don\\'t! Long-distance fees are so high these days, it\\'s outrageous.. LMAO

WTU: Well? Why haven\\'t you called?

DWU: Oh Dave, so high and mighty now, u must have forgotten all about last night and our \\\\sex and zen\\' sesh... Should I \\'cum\\' round now and remind u?

WTU: Fuck off!! I\\'m not reading your messages, go have your mental attack somewhere else

RG: Dave, something weird is happening, i cn\\'t get a signal with my phone

DWU: That\\'s not strange my dear, I did that.

WTU: Who are you you fucking evil shit???

DWU: EVIL??? Harsh...

RG: OK bitch, I\\'ve called the cops! They\\'re gonna trace ur IP, u will laugh the other side of your arse soon!

WTU: Well done Rose my girl!

YouRGonnDie: Oh, that\\'s not becessary Rose my dear (Chuckle)

WTU: ??? Her user name has changed!!!

RG: Whaddy mean cunt?

ImCummin4U: Because I\\'ll tell u where i am, u don\\'t have to trouble the John Qs (angels)

WTU: Rose.. I think..

RG: Sooo... Where r u???

UR4It: U really wanna know, Rosey-posey?

WTU: Howww...?

RG: yeah.. tell me

RightBehindU: :D :D :D

WTU: ROSE!!! ROSE!!!!

WTU: ROSE!!!!

WTU: ROSE..ROSANNA!!! ANSWER ME!!!!

RG: I\\'m logging out now Dave, I\\'m DEAD tired LOL See ya!

(RG Logs Out)

WTU: ROOOOSSSEEE!!!!!

DWU: So... How about dinner tomorrow, Davey-baby? (wink)

(TU Logs out)

The Medical Report on Ms. Michaels estimates that death occurred at or around 11pm. Cause of death was cardiac arrest, probably due to sudden, extreme shock, There were no marks of violence on the body. The police attempted to trace the IP of the third participant(s) in the chat, but there was no record of any such users ever registering for either service, and bizarrely, the IPU for all posts was utterly untracable, even with the most sophisticated anti-hacker systems the police had access to. The acse remains open and police ask all internet users to excercise caution and to report any harrassment or intrusion immediately

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