Today

by mark kubena

Waking. I hear a sound. A smell. Is that jasmine? So weird. A thought jumps into my head" Today I Don't Want To be ME. I don't want anything. No work , no worries, just maybe my mind will give me a hint. Ok, fine, maybe a nudge. Maybe just give me 15 more minutes. Just enough time to"

What is that roar in my head? Did you know that putting a conch shell to your head is not the ocean but the bloods rushing through the veins in your ears? I may be wrong but look it up. I digress. When did I feel this bad about the world? When did I feel this bad about me? I digress. I need to get out of bed, but I love the soft feel of the satin sheets slowly stroking my skin as I shift from side to side finding that perfect spot. Found it.

Just a moment longer and then I can wait until my cell phone to tell me to wake up. It's funny; I have an old ugly digital clock that I thought was the best thing ever. It shows the time on the ceiling where you don't have to even move out of bed. I think I looked up once to see the time.

Oh yeah, getting out of bed. Today I do something. Just a minute, I am waiting for my cell alarm to go off. That means I have at least two more minutes. And I still have not looked up at the time. Ok, now I am getting the strength. And... wait I moved my foot under the sheets into a better position, I really love that feeling when I move into the perfect spot on my right side and slide the top of my foot up and anchor it right below my knee. Just a twist of the hips, flatten the chest and and yes, reach out the arm and feel the cool side the pillow on the other side (I know that's an old Stewart Scott reference).

Ok time to get back to the original plan, but I may have another dream in me. I need a few minutes of peacefulness and some dreaming will power. I know I can get back into that dream earlier I was in. No I won't, maybe I can, no I won't, love a dumb clock. I only have 7 minutes. Wait. I only need five. I really am tired, I stayed up way too late and need to get the day started. But that one dream may put that smile on my face.

I really hate being late for classes in college. And why did I pick that really cool big house so far away from school where I need a cab. There are so many highways in Vegas and I will never get there on time. it's ok I am a senior and besides why not stop off on the back roads for some... boom told you I could get 5 more minutes out of 7.

So I knew I could do that, sorry. That is a unique trick that I have. Always salvage the last few minutes I can before I release myself unto the world. Time for a S.S.S. That's terminology for the older folk. Or military? Not sure, but I did learn WTSD. World Traveler, Snappy Dresser. (OK fine, Shit. Shower. Shave.)

Eyes opening, now I am getting my faculties. Need a sip of water and blow a big "fart" (I really wanted to say flatulence, but that's not what my body warms up to or understands) out to officially awake my body.

Done.

Waft, move, get up.

I think it's following me. Nope I out ran it. On to the important stuff, Ok that's odd. I am in my bathroom staring at a beautiful porcelain god, but I don't remember having a tan seat there, or the bathroom so clean... This is not my house...

Out again"

This time it was for only three minutes. But still on time to do what I need to do for the day

Today feels like a warm summer day. Kick the sheets off on my feet. I have some eye drops and q tips awaiting me in the bathroom. Wish I never had stopped drinking, or just cut down; otherwise I would still be in bed. No I did not. I just got a grin. It happens sometimes when I think of the best in the world.

Eyes feel revived, teeth are being cleaned and a dirty shower. (Wash cloth wiping the dirty parts of your body).

I would go through the details of what I am going to wear but I always plan that out the night before so there is not any thought in the morning. Fine, Tommy jeans, nice undies and expensive tube socks. Today, today will, will be some black boots.

Not going to have breakfast, never do, just going to walk out the door. I have my glock in my hand and ready to make the world right. Seriously? 5 more minutes and that is it? Where is time flying? My dreams are advancing at a quickening pace. It's ok, the day is still in its infancy and I now have all the time in the world.

The glistening sun hits my face as the door opens and the soundtrack of my favorite movie blares in my subconscious,

Bliss. Smiles. More Bliss"""""""". You FOR e A

I wonder who will be the lucky person today that I get to meet. Will they smile? I hope they do because the world is such a wonderful place. Maybe the sun will be warm and shinning on our faces as if god was reaching down and stroking our cheeks. That puts a smile on my face.

OK now I am walking with all the joy and love in my heart for the world to see. All that's left is what they get to feel. My woman is going with me; she is scornful but has no prejudice. No one respects me more than when I hold and love her. She loves to touch everyone. And I will be beside her and hold her while we go and reach out and touch all the lives we can. The sound of thunder will greet everyone we meet with joy of falling to earth as if they have been healed and fallen to rest.

My preaching is coming to a close and more men are coming to have their women come talk to me. They try to speak to me and I put them in their place. I am not rude. I am, I am " stern"That's when they spoke. Actually they spoke a little too well. In the chest? Too well spoken.

Really? Did I have to choose psych class on the other side of the campus and have to deal with that same lame dream about being in Survivor, starving on some stupid island" with Tom Bergeron in my living room laughing at all my mistakes. Dreams? Get cha every single time.

Today my day begins. I wonder if I will get the pleasant chance to meet you. I am blushing for that opportunity.

Hello, I think you just walked by me. My girl wants to say hi.

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