Break the Cycle

by Jordan Wellnitz

Im afraid.

Im afraid of so many stupid, contradictory things.

Im afraid of being alone

But I am also afraid of letting people in-

Afraid of getting hurt,

Of being misunderstood

Or changed;

Of being broken.

Its like Im stuck-

Trapped-

In a never-ending loop.

I break out, meet someone,

Fall in love,

Let them in,

And then they break me-

Betray me.

They hurt me

And I go back to being alone

And the cycle is never ending.

I cant seem to break free.

Every time I meet someone new,

They promise theyll save me,

And the funnier part is

That I am so fucking desperate

To be freed of the cycle

And to have someone completely love and accept me

That I believe them wholeheartedly.

Then the cycle continues

And Im alone.

Sometimes I think it would be best if I just stayed alone.

I just break that fear,

Rather than the other.

 

I just need to break the cycle.

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