Desperate

by Jordan Wellnitz

Desperately, I reach out to you,

Begging and pleading,

"Don't let this be the end!"

Blood runs down my legs,

From the scrapes on my knees.

I feel as though I've been

Chasing you for years,

But every step I take towards you

Is another mile you pull away.

So, desperately I try to reach you,

To keep you here with me

For you are the only person

On this Earth

Who makes me feel like I belong.

Like I belong with you;

Like I belong in this body;

Like I belong alive.

But just like that,

In an instance,

You make me feel like I'm nothing.

Like I don't belong;

Like I don't deserve to waste this space;

Like I don't deserve to breath in this precious oxygen.

But still...I still reach for you,

Begging for you to save me

Because you are the only one who can.

You...you are a double-sided blade.

One side builds,

The other destroys.

You hold the power to choose.

Will you build me up?

Or will you rip me apart?

And still, knowing this...

I still reach for you so desperately,

Hoping that you'll choose to build me;

To help me become who I need to become,

To save me from being swallowed up

By the cruelty and injustice of this world.

So I'll reach for you as I lose my grip,

Will you catch me? Or let me fall?

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