The Incredible Invasion of Earth

by Thomas Edward

The Incredible Invasion of Earth (Present Tense)

The full moons glow delivers beams of light throughout the rolling hills and farmlands. The tranquil quiet night allows all creatures, big and small, to rest comfortably. The picturesque view of the heartland remains undisturbed, biding its time until the new day dawns and the sleepy world begins its daily rituals.

Thousands of tiny stars twinkle in the vast dark that colors the night sky. Although they are a constant companion to the moon, the stars never seem to vary much from their nightly course from horizon to horizon. But when the usual celestial dance appears to sway back and forth for one more song, a small point of light slowly begins to grow brighter. Moments pass, and the flickering glow intensifies. The moons lonely presence gains company as the ball of light challenges it for space to occupy. Soon it becomes apparent that this light display is special and alive. It starts a deliberate circling motion, as if trying to find a comfortable place to land. As the light finally arrives to greet a lowly farm and its inhabitants, its true identity is revealed.

A disk shaped saucer that harkens back to the movies from decades gone by hovers above the ground. With a whooshing sound, three metal legs extend from its belly. Once they have reached their limit, the wayward spacecraft begins its decent, landing on earth. The whirring noise from the extraterrestrial craft soon gives way to an eerie quiet.

Suddenly, the silence is broken by a clank and the sound of gears turning. A platform slowly lowers from the underside of the fuselage. A piercing light illuminates three humanoid images inside. Eventually, the ramp touches down, signaling the largest of them to venture out. His three legs shuffle about as he descends the ramp. Stopping halfway, his row of multiple eyes dart about. His three long, funnel shaped ears sway, collecting every sound of this world. Noticing that he is alone on the ramp, he turns back. Blok! The two hapless minions creep along, shaking from fear. They are not paying attention and run into the confident leader, who had stopped. He turns around, scolding them for their insubordination. Blok!

They stumble back, apologizing, Gerp. Durp.

Unhappy with them, but undeterred, he turns to view the barnyard and the strange surroundings that engulf it. But while basking in the silence, an unusual noise startles him. He draws his blaster and fires. The blast rips through the blades of a rickety windmill, sending hundreds of tiny shards in all directions. The dissipating smoke gives him satisfaction and he chuckles favorably, Blok, blok.

Before he revels in the glory of his manly accomplishment, another unusual noise rings out loud, Nay!

The two minions jump behind their leader, frightened once again. Gerp! Durp! The towering alien in charge swings his arm around, pointing his weapon carelessly. He holds his trigger finger this time, not wanting to haplessly cause another loud commotion. Looking down the end of his blaster with his multiple eyes, he sees an odd life form standing precariously behind a wooden fence. It happens to be a goat.

With a sly look, he turns with a swagger and notices his two pitiful followers, shaking uncontrollably. Using his skinny finger to command them, he points down the ramp. Blok! Both diminutive aliens look up reluctantly, only to receive a scrawny pointing finger. They take small, hesitant footsteps, easing their way down. Gradually, they approach the ground. Now close enough, their reluctance holds them back. The green grass presents a new challenge, one that is met harshly. Blok!

The smallest alien is unknowingly shoved by his partner to be the guinea pig. To his amazement, the touch of the grass is inviting, not deadly. A smile, as big as a galaxy, occupies his face. He casually strolls around until something perplexing stops his progress. A colorful, spherical object resembling a miniature planet sits at his feet. An inquisitive look gives way to curiosity. He bends over, extending his finger. A moment of hesitation ends, and he touches it. With a quick jerk, his hand is pulled back to his chest. His eyes are closed tightly. Slowly, one by one, each eye opens. To his surprise, the world did not end. A gleeful look around is followed by an adventurous reach down and he grabs the ball firmly with both hands. A few playful tosses in the air adds reassurance, and he quickly looks to test this new toy. Raising his hands high over his head as if to display a trophy, the small alien bounces the ball hard on the ground. A return trajectory slams the rubber ball into his face. A shocked and hurt look washes over his face. Durp! He scampers back as fast as his three legs will allow him, hiding behind the towering leaders legs, continuing to shake uncontrollably.

Disgusted by the lack of guts of the terrified extraterrestrial, the confident alien pushes the little one away, making his way down the ramp mumbling. Blok, blok, blok. With a determined march, he heads toward the offending object, gun pointed directly at it. Stopping and standing over the top of the ball, he waits for a response that never comes. Agitated, he shows his contempt by nudging it with his front foot. The helpless ball rolls forward. As it stops, having caused no harm, the angered alien glances back with a disapproving stare. Both of the minions look about, trying not to make eye contact. The emboldened alien turns back, advancing toward the motionless toy. In one fluid motion, he kicks it as hard as possible. As it flies off into the barnyard, he turns back with a smug look. Before he can utter any insults, the ball returns, having bounced off a tree and hits him in the head. Stunned and off balance, he twirls around, spinning out of control.

Nay! A mocking from the goat can be heard, as well as concern and shock from the minions. Gerp. Durp.

The rubber ball settles into a comfortable spot. Once the staggered alien gets his wits about him and sees the ball taunting him, he draws his blaster and fires a single blast. An enormous explosion sends dirt and smoke into the sky. Holding his gun steady, still aimed at the same spot, he sees the cloud of debris dissipate. A vacant crater gives satisfaction enough to lower the firearm. With an arrogant smile and turning around to boast, he begins to open his mouth, but receives a surprise. The ball makes a return, falling hard and landing on his head. The resulting contact once again sends the brutish alien into a downward, staggering spiral, resulting in him falling on his extraterrestrial derriere.

The two minions gasp, while the goat gives a taunting, Nay!

Feeling embarrassed, and with a highly bruised ego, the once formidable alien collects his thoughts and stands back up. As he dusts himself off, his followers rush over to lend a helping hand. They fumble around, causing more damage than help. The angered leader shoos them away, Blok! Blok! As he tries to regain some measure of control, a familiar sound becomes nails on a chalkboard. Nay!

Wanting payback, but somewhat reluctant, the enraged alien pushes away his followers and searches frantically. His hunt ends with the discovery of the ball, perched atop an old teeter-totter. It sits, resting on the worn seat, supported by the handlebars. Hoping to extract a little vengeance, the upset leader cautiously marches toward the structure, but stops once near.

Unsure of what the result might be from a head on confrontation, he motions to his minions to fall in. Still trembling, they shake their heads. Blok. Losing his patience with them, he barks angrily for them to join him. They scuttle along, reluctantly arriving and bumping into their distracted leader. He whips around, looking to bash them on the head. Before he can, his thoughts return to his antagonist. Standing at the foot of the teeter-totter, his route to the ball is one he is not willing to go on his own. He points, directing his minions. They look at each other, apprehensive to advance further. Blok! Both turn to see the frightening alien standing over them. With a blaster pointed their way, they move to the edge and slowly climb on. They push each other, back and forth, hoping not to be the closest one. In the end, the smallest alien loses the struggle. Hesitant, he leads the way, one tiny step at a time. Once to the middle, a single step on the other side causes the teeter-totter to jostle slightly. He quickly moves back, trembling. Both frightened aliens look to exit the structure, only to be met with a blaster once again. Forcing them back to the edge, all three step on and slowly begin to climb. The brooding leader stops prematurely, allowing the others to continue. Once they reach the halfway point, the littlest alien stops, causing his comrade to bump into him. They hesitate, neither wanting to move. Annoyed, their agitated leader points his scrawny finger, signaling for them to move forward. They shake their heads vigorously. A taunt from the goat is heard, poking at the angered extraterrestrial, so he points his ray gun at his scared minions to make his point. Feeling no other option, the frightened aliens turn to advance when the teeter-totter dips slightly. They shuffle back to the safe side.

The angered leader marches up to them Blok! He kicks them, sending them far enough to the other side that their weight causes a quick drop. As they join the ball in a descent, the once emboldened alien is rocketed into the air, screaming like girl. He shoots a random blast before landing on the ground. Shaking the cobwebs away, he stands up unaware of his location. Before he can think, a charging goat lands a perfectly placed head butt to the posterior. BLOK! Ejected from the goats pen, the surprised alien soars in the air, landing with a thud. His terrified followers stop following and begin to back pedal.

Looking up from his grounded position, the battered alien hears a familiar taunt, Nay! Quick to stand up and show the annoying creature his superiority, he is oblivious to the position of the ball and steps on it. As he falls backward, a single shot is fired carelessly. Once on his posterior, the perplexed alien glances up to the pen, only to see smoke coming from the disintegrated fence. Suddenly, the goat emerges, charging from the smoke with its head down. A surprised look on the face of all three has them scrambling and falling over each other. Blok! Gerp! Durp! A frantic race to the ramp is followed by a quick close of the door. The ramp retracts, and the saucer climbs quickly into the night sky. Within seconds, they vanish into the heavens, faster than they had arrived.

The formidable goat finishes watching their departure. Content to have the farm return its sleepy state of rest, he head butts the ball, innocently playing with his accomplice.

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