Paul Schmitt(sequel 2)

by Michel Bessy

I won t linger on what came to pass after JONES realized that the truck driver who had given him a lift had lifted his wallet.....Anyone endowed with a reasonable I Q can imagine what it feels like to be stranded in a railway station 80 miles from home without a farthing(Interestingly ,dear reader,a quick glance at the dictionary informed me that it was an ancient coin worth a quarter of a penny!So that if you re yawning your head off over this talented piece of writing,you ll marvel at its educational value!) let alone the lousy weather conditions....................................Anyway he did succeed in going back home and now he was in sight of the maternity home to see his new born son and his wife by the same token.Despite the blows he had been singlehandedly pummeled with,he was in a happy mood and kept thinking that this was a new lease on life.He crossed his fingers but couldn t touch wood!Was he getting supersticious?After all the reverses he had endured,it was surprising he didn t have a lucky charm in his pocket or maybe he had been the punching ball of fate because he hadn t any!........He couldn t refrain a smile as he visualized charlie CHAPLIN in CITY LIGHTS about to fight another boxer for a mere pittance.Charlie had noticed that the previous fighter had run a rabbit s foot all over his body and seizing the opportunity that nobody watched him,he did alike but at the same moment the proud owner of the rabbit s foot was carried into the dressing room on a stretcher.He had lost his bout in three minutes flat and now CHARLIE was frantically trying to erase the traces of the ill fated rabbit s foot...........................................................................................................Mr JONES entered the building(as ELVIS was leaving it)and went straight to room24,where his wife was now resting.As he was about to open the door,a hand grasped his arm:a tall big nurse and she seemed to mean business....."Mr JONES,I presume"? "That s right.Can I see my wife and my son"? "Certainly,but I have to warn you.There s a little hitch." "What do you mean,a little hitch"?JONES retorted... "Well,sir,your son has no legs" "I beg your pardon" "I m really sorry,but he has no legs" JONES was stunned but quickly pulled himself together "We ll love him all the same"and at the same moment he saw a rabbit foot doing a somersault on a beam..........."I m afraid we re not done."The nurse added. "Now, what we ll you come up with"?JONES asked angrily "sir,your son has no arms!" JONES heart skipped a beat and he had to lean on the nurse s shoulder.He suddenly blanched and felt nauseous.He couldn t utter a single word.Then,he managed to croak out "another stroke of fate! Finally,he tried to get up but the nurse made him sit down again "sir,you really have all my simpathy.Would you like a shot of whisky to buck you up?.....I afraid that s not all.Your son has no trunk!" JONES jumped out of the armchair and rushed to the room with the nurse in hot pursuit. He saw his wife and close to her bed there was a cradle.Like a robot,he slowly looked inside and what he saw took his breath away....................An EAR.......A huge EAR which seemed to stare at him! JONES could only whisper "Don t worry,son,we ll take care of you and we ll give you all the love you need" At the same moment,the nurse who was standing just behind him,said " Speak louder sir.She s deaf!"..........................Thereupon,Mrs JONES who hadn t said anything yet,remarked "You know darling,as he has a French uncle,I suggest we call him LOUIS .........".I beg your pardon said JONES who wasn t particularly versed in foreign languages."What the heck do you mean?" "My dear husband,had you been a good pupil at school instead of playing noughts and crosses during the French lessons,you d know that in FRENCH L OUIE MEANS HEARING and LOUIS is a first name,hence the play on words!.........

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