2015-08-14 the Twisting Road - Journal Entry

by Matt Triewly

I'm driving along the coast road. It isn't a sunny day but it isn't raining either. Grey. Overcast. The time is around about half past four. We've not long ago had a cup of tea overlooking the haven and the esplanade. It was nice doing that. Relaxing. Tranquil. I like relaxing and tranquil. I realise that I also quite like driving too. Most of the time. The missus is with me and the plan is to have a meal out. I don't feel like cooking today. I'm day off.

I look at the road ahead. It's twisting, full of curves and I can't see the end of it. Maybe there is no end to it. I attempt to make a metaphor out of that thought. Make some clever and profound remark linking life to an endless road. An apparently endless road. But I can't be bothered. Suddenly I recall the dream I had a while back. I feel the need to share it with the missus.

"Did I tell you about the dream I had about a year back, darling?"

"What dream was that?"

"Well, I found myself in this very strange place. It was surreal and psychedelic with things constantly manifesting and metamorphosing. I was kind of mesmerised by it all and I felt bewildered. Around me people were passing by like they would in a street. As this woman hurried by I stopped her and I asked where I was. She replied, 'You're in heaven.' I immediately responded, 'What's heaven?' 'Heaven is a place where you are permitted not to understand,' she had explained matter-of-factly and in a tone that suggested everyone knew that. She then continued on her way to god knows where. The dream had then ended at that point. Or I had woken up. I can't remember now."

"Very strange," the missus says. "What do you think it means?"

"I think it's the subconscious telling me not to over analyse things. Which is one of the things that I do. Far too much."

"I agree with that. You do."

I don't say anything for a bit. I watch the scenery passing by and the car 'eating the road' under it. I feel passive.

I then add, "Yeah, I have over analysed things over the years. It's done me no good. Made plans that have failed when I would have been better just drifting through life and letting it all wash over me. I should live a simple life. Live for the day. Only think when I need to think. Accept things. Accept the absurdity and meaningless of life, the universe and everything."

"Yes, you don't need to understand everything to enjoy life."

We both fall silent for a bit. We round the last corner and the road becomes straight for a while. I can see further ahead. For now.

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