My Name Is

by Tiffany Schilf

"My Name Is"

Walking into school at the bell of 7:00am, one boy, known by, so many invisible people. It's his fourth year of highschool, and it's mid semester. Trying to make friends, he tries, he does. In the commons, he walks up to a random kid who says, "Hello, my name is Jared - -."

Singing he responds, "Hi, my name is, what? My name is, who? My name is, chka-chka Nyquillus Dillwad."

"Umm, you okay dude?" Jared responded.

"Do you like violence?!"

"No, I actually puke at the sight of - -"

"Wanna see me shove eight inch envelopes through each one of my eye sockets?"

"Oh god!" Jared pukes right in front of Nyquillus.

Nyquillus looked down, and looked up at Jared. (Paused for a brief moment). He asked, "Have you, any eight inch envelopes?"

As Jared could hardly speak, he slowly looked up at Nyquillus. He put his hand on the pillar closest to him in the commons, as with his other, he wrapped around his stomach. Nyquillus, proceeding on, without any eight inch envelopes. As the two minutes pass, from talking to Jared, the conversation ended, and Nyquillus tried to look for someone else to make friends with. As Nyquillus walked, he came across another guy. He saw him. He had him in site. He visualized. He sang deeply in his mind, "Hi, my name is, what? My name is, who? My name is, chka-chka Nyquillus Dillwad." But thought to himself, and decided. "You know, nothing comes close to me." He walked up to Guy. Guy asked curiously, "Sup boi, what you need? Name's Riddle Squeeeeps."

"My brain's dead, I'm trying to get my head straight. But I can't figure out which one of these pears to evaporate?"

"Man you wasted."

"Uh-uhh," he responded with an innocent look.

"So why's your face ready to explode?"

"Well, since I was an alien, I felt like something else, cause I hung myself from a ten foot pillar with a rope, just to crack some jokes. Got pissed off and chopped Bruce Lee's head off."

"Breh, I think you need to take a minute, and think about what you need. And I think I have what you need. (He reached in his pocket) Here, I have a peeler for the pear, it takes the skin off, easier than a knife,"

"NO, evaporate! Evaporate! Do you not see, the words that are coming out of my mouth?! - -"

"Dude, are you - - You can't see words coming out of someone's mouth.," Riddle explained.

"Well, forget you!"

Nyquillus, figured it was time to leave that conversation with Riddle. So, he started walking to his first hour. It's 7:10, and his first subject is Theatre. On his way, he passes all the sucking faces, loner lonesomes, the jocks, and the geeks, but someone stops him, a math teacher, Mr. Pistop. He asked, "So how're your classes going this year Dillwad? I hope they're all passing grades."

"Well, you know, my English teacher wanted to flunk me, last semester. She told me, your work wasn't acceptable. And said to her, 'thanks a lot, next semester I'll be twenty-five. I smacked her in the face with my folder, and chased her with scissors. I cut her pointer finger off her right hand, so she couldn't grade me again. The principles came for me, pulled me out of class and said that I'll be kicked out of school. That day, I wasn't from then on out, to come back to the school."

"Son, why are you here, if you're not suppose to be here? And how do you have classes too?"

"Well, see my schedule is still in the system, and I changed my looks."

"Shouldn't they be able to recognize your name?"

"Who? "

Interrupting their conversation, Principle Smoochie, and a cop walk up to Nyquillus, being one of the principles who can remember him, and that he's not suppose to be school. He said with an attitude to Dillwad, "Stop talking! Mr. Pistop, this kid needs to be locked away! Don't just stand there, handcuff him. Take him out!"

Nyquillus responds with innocence, "No, I'm not ready to leave! No! No, it's too scary to be a part of the gummy bear jail!"

Nyquillus was cuffed, and escorted out. Never again had anyone seen him since.

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