Justinain The Red King


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Joined
April 2013

Stories
7

Comments
9

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0

Last Active
September 2013

Reputation
1520

Commented
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Justinain The Red King's received comments

  • I like the descriptions and a clear picture is painted here. I wish it were longer with more development, but that's just me. For the length, I enjoyed it.

    Not rated
  • An interesting read, but left the reader with too many unanswered questions. What was his gift? How did he intend using it? What was this future he envisaged? A believable style of writing. Enjoyable.
    B.

    Not rated
  • Entertaining. The end came a bit suddenly but certainly raised some interesting questions!
    B.

    Not rated
  • From Jaynne mat on Truth

    I liked it alot. I was waiting for the 'gift' to be more visualized, and attention grabbing action at the beginning. The character seeing the black of the lies, was great! Why not make more action with the 'black smoke'. You could use it to create a character that continues to turn his life around with more action and maybe more magic within his 'gift'.

    Not rated
  • From Eric on Truth

    I am neither pro or anti religious in my evaluation...just looking at it as a reader

    Not rated
  • From Eric on Truth

    Is this the beginning of a longer story? If not I would have to say that it lacks some direction, only hinting vaguely at the protagonists "gift" and the apparent dislike of scientifically validated isues regarding the planet's environment.
    If the intent is some sort of religious enlightenment by Veritas, then you might look to include that, or at least some hint of the intent of the piece.
    I did like the way parts of Veritas' background and personal history were sketched out. It made him a believable and more sympathetic character.

    Not rated